The Players


Mr IVF and the Mango Princess are 2 “over 35” Australians who have been living largish (but sans alcohol these days) in NYC for the last 5-6 years. Mr IVF appears to have stupid tadpoles and busted nuts. He can grow a fair batch of little fellas (whats wrong with 5 million I ask you – how many frikkin taddies do you need?!?), but doesn’t seem to hit the bar of normal blokes who can clock up around 20 million. His tadpoles are also a bit stupid and don’t seem to like swimming and when they do swim they swim in circles or something. So, if my tadpoles had a car licence, they could park in the blue spot at the front of the supermarket.

From Mango’s point of view, she has passed every test they throw at her, well apart from the “carry a healthy baby full term” one, but thats not her fault, my dopey little fells could be behind this. For the uninitiated out there, the test women go though should qualify them to be astronauts, or as a min contenders on Its a Knockout (if that show was still on TV) or American Gladiator. She puts down her age (38th Birthday just passed in August) and potential lower egg quality as her rationale for being on the IVF tour of duty. Fair enough – we call it evens. It doesn’t really matter who between us “caused” this, we are both in this and it doesnt matter really what caused us to get here. We are lucky to have what science is available to help us.

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